My Life in Boxes

Since receiving the news that we were approved to live in the apartment I've felt much more comfortable with packing. I didn't want to start until I knew for sure we were 100% going. I have more than enough boxes and I'm really trying to make a concerted effort to throw away things I don't need to avoid moving junk that may just be thrown away out in Bakersfield.

The plan is for Jeff to come up early Thursday morning and to pack all my stuff up in his dad's SUV and my car, and drive out to Bakersfield. Once there we will sign the lease and move my stuff into the apartment. We will also measure the apartment for furniture. We will leave my car in our parking spot and take the SUV back to his parent's house in Valencia. Friday morning we will begin to move his furniture and stuff to the apartment and Friday night should be the first night we spend in the apartment.

Also, and I just think this part is kind of funny, I've never seen the apartment before so I am literally moving with no idea of what the apartment looks like, if it feels like home, if I like it, etc. I guess I just have to trust that I will love it!

All Good Things

Two pieces of completely outstanding and wonderful news occurred yesterday.

First, we have been approved for the apartment. There is still some paperwork to be faxed and completed by Jeff's dad since he co-signed for us, but it is basically ours. They said we could even move in earlier if we wanted to, but September 1st is the earliest Jeff and I could do that. My last day at work is a week from today and we're moving the day after. So I think that time frame is already pretty strict.

Second, I GOT ACCEPTED INTO GRADUATE SCHOOL!!! I received an email from Fielding yesterday informing me I have been accepted. So today began a month long process for enrolling and student orientations and faxing and mailing paperwork and on and on and on.

How is it possible that I'm only two days into this and I'm completely exhausted?

How I Pray/Apparently It Works

We got an apartment!

Sleepy Saturday

This morning was the first time I woke up and completely forgot I was supposed to go to work. Thankfully I remembered right after I hit the snooze button and before I got back in to bed. Since then I have developed a headache/migraine and I'm feeling chilly in the office.

As far as the whole Bakersfield situation is concerned, Jeff found another apartment that is a lot less expensive and he put a deposit down on Thursday. We should be hearing about it Monday. I haven't started packing up my room yet and I feel I won't be able to until I know for sure I have a home to move into. I did start cleaning last night and that was when it hit me that it is going to take a lot more time and effort to pack than I originally anticipated.

Jeff is coming up today and he has offered to help with the packing and whatnot. I'm just happy that I will get to spend time with him.

Terrific Tuesday

The word of the day today must be terrific because I'm saying it a lot and that is how I'm feeling. Fingers crossed that it continues for the remainder of the day!

Edited @ 10pm

Yes. Today was a great day. I gave notice to my boss and it wasn't nearly what I thought it would be. He didn't even react all that much. Strange.

I called Fielding to check up on my admission status and they informed me that my admission portfolio has been sent to the program director for review. So that means I should be hearing back from someone either by the end of this week or maybe next week. It was a great thing I called because they alerted me to the fact that I had no completed some of the financial aid steps, such as the entrance counseling and signing a master promissory note. So I got those done (on the iPad, no less) and tomorrow I just have to fax in a signed document and I'm done.

On the apartment front, they did call to say that they were attempting to verify that I had indeed lived in Anacapa Village at CSUCI but they weren't getting a lot of cooperation from the school (shocker) so I managed to take care of that, I think. I imagine we'll be hearing a final word from them tomorrow.

And then on the job front, I heard back from the lady I interviewed with last week and things are looking good. I feel like a full time job is right around the corner. In the meantime, I'm helping out a friend who is the owner of a surrogacy practice in Los Angeles, Santa Barbara and San Francisco. I get to dive into some social media projects and help out a great organization at the same time.

My grandma says that things are falling into place for me and I can't help but think that it is somehow true. And then there is that tiny, nagging voice that is telling me to not get too happy too quickly. Maybe that voice will go away once the apartment comes through. I still feel like the apartment is the key to everything.

Reading the Signs

I am a person who believes in signs. I'm not quite sure how to succinctly define what I mean but I hope you understand. The location of my interview last Thursday was two doors down from Starbucks. I take that as a good sign because I love Starbucks. Also, it was convenient because Starbucks offers free WiFi and Jeff was able to comfortably wait for me to attend my interview while he enjoyed the free WiFi on my iPad.

Shortly after an interview that put an embarrassingly big smile on my face Jeff and I went looking for an apartment. We went to pre-selected complexes and were having no luck. One complex gave us a map of other complexes we didn't even know existed and one of them was Rio Paseo. Rio Paseo looks like the apartments we toured and fell in love with in Oxnard (Serenade at River Park). They also happened to be the only complex with any openings. As we exited I noticed a car with a CSUCI alumni license plate holder and took it as a great sign.

That was Thursday. Friday evening we decided to go for it. Saturday morning they had two 1-bedrooms left so Jeff and his parents drove out to Bakersfield. By the time they got there only one was left. Apartment 8E. They put a deposit down. Sunday morning I drove out there with my mom and grandma and put in my application. Today, Monday, I received a postcard from Rio Paseo in the mail.

Crystal,
Thank you for visiting our beautiful community. We'd love to welcome you "Home" here at Rio Paseo =) Please call us with any questions! It was so nice to meet you.

Another sign.

There is still a part of me that is holding back despite all of the excitement that is building up around us. I've been asking myself if it's a feeling that things will not turn out the way we planned them (yet again) or if I'm simply apprehensive because I've never done anything like this before. Which is the most logical answer? I think the correct answer is that I'm scared. Scared in the way any normal person would be if they were making enormous changes to their life. I don't question anything about my life with Jeffrey because I am completely and totally in love with him. But I've been talking for so long about moving forward with our lives together and now something is really happening. If I weren't scared I would lack perspective, right?

Tomorrow I've told myself I will give my formal two weeks notice but there is a part of me that is apprehensive. Maybe I should wait until we know for sure we have the apartment? What happens if we don't get in for whatever reason? What if I have to cancel moving and rescind my notice. Is that really what I'm afraid of? Would that be embarrassing? Would it be worth getting embarrassed about?

My mom has been making delcarative statements that scare me. When you move out this or when you move out that. I tell her nothing is certain and to please not jinx it. And yet I'm the one interpreting signs that I believe the universe is giving me. All I know is that things are going to change one way or the other and there is no way to bypass that. Everything will change. To not be flummoxed would be silly, right?

A Case of the Tuesdays

In one way I look forward to Tuesdays because it is the only day of the week I work a full day, which is great for my paycheck. When I'm not feeling well on a Tuesday, it's a problem. I made it to work and everything was fine. I was a bit grumpy this morning and may have been a touch short with a client (I will apologize to him when he comes in on Saturday). Then I had a bit of an upset stomach and a general feeling of uneasiness. And so, at noon when I would normally go to lunch, I went home for the day.

I stopped by Subway for takeout on the way home and was happily surprised when a little girl who was holding the door open for her companions also insisted she hold it open for me. Even my mother was impressed when I told her what happened. It's the kind of thing I was raised to do and sometimes fail to.

My sandwhich was terrific (footlong meatball marinara on Italian herb and cheese bread with mayo and olives). I'm also trying to keep hydrated (Deja Blue water is a personal favorite) and I find that the more water I drink the more thirsty I become. Strange, isn't it? Fatigue overtook me and what was meant to be a 1 and a half hour nap turned into nearly 3 hours. My grandma always says that if your body needs to sleep and keeps you asleep, it's a good thing. And yet I'm the one who is afraid it will mess up my sleep schedule. (That's why I don't allow myself to sleep in much, even on Sundays).

The rest of the week is going to be very different for me. Tomorrow before work I will pack, then after work I will make the lovely drive down to Valencia. If I time it correctly I could be driving along the 101 in Santa Barbara and northern Ventura as the sun is dipping into the ocean. I can already imagine opening the sun roof and listening to awesome music. Maybe I should make a playlist?

Thursday is Bakersfield. My interview is at 10 (still deciding what to wear) and then we're looking at apartments the rest of the day. This will be my first trip to Bakersfield and I'm curious to see what the city is all about. Friday I'll come back home and resume my weekly schedule. Although, it feels as if the rest of my life hinges upon this Thursday.

I try not to let the anxiety get to me and so far I think I'm doing an okay job. The anxiety isn't manifesting physically or emotionally just yet. Maybe that means I'm handling it better than I have in the past?

Anyway, I'm really excited by this job opportunity and I want to make the best impression possible. I have AMAZING letters of recommendation to bring with me and honestly, if I was hiring someone and I read these letters, I would hire them. Not to sound arrogant, because I am quite humbled by the things my long-time companions have said about me, but it does give me a boost of confidence to know I'm going into this job interview armed with as much as possible.

In the meantime it is still Tuesday, still rather early, and I'm just trying to relax and stay hydrated. And I'm trying to push the apprehension away and out of my mind.

The Internet Has Grown Up

The Internet turns 20 today and we have all come a long way from the days of chat rooms and that familiar jingle, "you've got mail!" it hasn't been 20 years for me, but there has been a computer presence in my home almost as long. In fact, I remember being able to navigate somewhat through the DOS commands our first computer required. I remember classroom trips to the computer lab to play Oregon Trail and Where In the World is Carmen San Diego. Oh, the nostalgia.

Our first computer with a Windows operating system (the kind that didn't require DOS) was a Compaq Presario, given to us by my grandpa. Another Compaq followed after that. Around the age of 18 I went half-and-half on a Compaq desktop with my family. Soon after that I got my first laptop, also a Compaq, for a whopping $1,000. The last desktop I ever bought is still with me today (it has all of the Sims 2 games on it) and I will use it from time to time, but I haven't lately. After I graduated from community college I was gifted an Acer laptop to take with me to CSU Channel Islands. A year later I jointly purchased a MacBook with Jeff. I gave the Acer to my grandma. I used the MacBook for as long as I could before Jeff took it over full time to use in his last two years in school. February of last year was when my mom bought me the laptop I use now, a shiny red Dell. All of these computers aided me in learning everything I could about the Internet. Years before I learned Photoshop I had Jasc Paint Shop Pro versions 5 & 7. I learned how to code in HTML, DHTML, and later CSS. In the summer of 1998 I asked my mom if I could make a web page. She only had one question; is it free? Was it! I first ventured into Tripod (my screen name was sweetsugar98. Then Geocities sometime later. That very first site had a maroon background with a picture of the Backstreet Boys dressed in yellow, or vise versa. Many summer nights were spent searching for everything related to the Backstreet Boys.

This was all before Google, MySpace, Facebook and Twitter.

It is difficult to imagine what our lives would be like if we never had the Internet. Though I imagine no one really guessed it would change our lives so drastically when the Internet first made an appearance 20 years ago. What will happen in the next 20?

Another Week Gone By

I feel like this week has been fraught with strangeness. Moreover, it seems like the week went by pretty fast. On Monday I applied for a terrific job in Bakersfield. On Tuesday I was called by employer of said terrific job to come in for an interview (that will be next Thursday). On Wednesday I was supposed to have plans with my family but there were some communication errors that delayed the plans and left me a bit grumpy. On Thursday I was lazy and stayed in my pajamas for as long as possible (though I did not neglect to shower). That night at work I kept getting the creepy crawlies. Today I watched some tv, my Sims game became corrupted, and I spent a few hours trying to fix everything up. I went to work for a little while, Taco Bell for dinner, and here I am in bed a couple hours earlier than the last couple nights. Tomorrow I will wake up, go to work, do those rescheduled plans with my family and have some time off until the process starts over once again next week.
I cannot wait to have more structure in my life. No, seriously.